Some Great Places to Smoke Outdoors this Summer

August 11, 2015

Looking for some great places to smoke outside this Summer? We got ya covered.

Spontaneous road trips are fun—even more so when you’re by yourself! There’s nothing better than finding a cool roadside spot, and heading out onto the open road with nothing but good music and some smokes. One of my favorite road trip stops that you and your cigars can take together is The Maine Winery and Yarn Museum in historic downtown Yankakok. It opens every July for summer tourists and smoking is allowed! Be forewarned, though: in 2010 they moved the smoking area one mile down the road after Jesus Rabinowitz, a retired proctologist from Brooklyn, had too many glasses of Chardonnay and flicked his smoldering cigar ash onto the floor of building #2, destroying King Tut’s 5,000-year-old cardigan sweater collection.

Summer isn’t quite summer without a trip to the zoo. Now, smoking is prohibited at most zoos, but several of them have designated smoking areas. To resolve this issue, you can call in advance, or you can take your chances by waiting to smoke that delicious Montecristo Epic Robusto  at the Elephant Pavilion. I have a feeling that those who are willing to lean up against a fence in the broiling heat to watch a 6- ton beast take a dump the size of a small mountain will hardly notice your cigar smoke. In fact, they may welcome it!

The local outdoor Flea Market is a great place to visit in the summer, and an even better place to enjoy the sun while puffing on your Rocky Patel Fire. It’s highly unlikely that you’ll run into the Royal family here, and have the Prince of Nottingham ask you to extinguish your smoke, so no worries. Most of the regulars that you will encounter will have mullets. Even the kids. In addition, most of them will be too busy navigating through five miles of dusty picnic tables loaded with everybody’s useless crap to care about your wafting smoke. (You also may save a few bucks on that plastic Japanese Samurai sword that you always wanted but have no clue why.)

There’s no better day trip than going fishing with your favorite cigars. For those of you who don’t fish often, just buy a cheap pole (perhaps at the Flea Market), dig up some worms, and find the nearest lake. Even if you don’t catch anything, there is nothing more relaxing than watching the bobber thingy jump up and down in the rippling waters with a nice fat Saint Luis Rey Gen 2 Titan  sticking out of your kisser. The best part is that most fish won’t complain. That is, unless you have some strange reaction to your anti-anxiety medicine and a giant Gefilte fish who calls himself Melvin, and is wearing sunglasses, jumps out of the water and threatens to call the authorities if you keep smoking.

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