More USELESS Ramblings and … A GREAT NEW CIGAR, HERE AT JR !

March 19, 2015

To say we are currently in a major cigar renaissance would be an understatement. It seems that a new premium offering is hitting the shelves every Tuesday (sarcasm)! Now that would be a bad thing if they were all a bunch of dog rockets but, damn, just about every new brand lately has been a winner. The only tough part about this new boutique invasion is trying to decide which one to smoke. In addition, this new generation of cigarmakers always seems to have a soulful and esoteric story behind their latest creation. For example:

“Juan Shapiro Cigars is the story of one man’s journey through the murky streets of Memphis where his love of death-metal music, Twinkies, and the Dalai Lama gave him the vision to create a cigar like no other!”

Oy vey! It sure was a lot easier buying cigars in the old days when elderly Cuban-born, guayabera-clad cigarmakers with hands dyed brown by the leaf that they rolled just created a blend because it tasted good, end of story!

But don’t go by me; I’m just a crotchety old fart who is bitter because he gave away two houses and now resides in a one-bedroom apartment with two neurotic dogs, and is always losing his reading glasses. In fact, it’s good that the industry is filled with glamour these days and, yes, these new young guns with a poignant story behind their sticks are really cranking out some good product! Perhaps old Sigmund was wrong; maybe a cigar is not just a cigar anymore. Who cares what he thought anyway? Freudian theory revolves around the notion that the unconscious mind’s governing behavior is directly related to donuts and penises, that sick bastard!

Now that I wasted 10 minutes of your life that you will never get back, I’m going to tell you why I wrote this farkakte blog. So, if anyone is still there, sit back on your favorite recliner or toilet seat (or reclining toilet seat) and read on; I promise it gets better!

General Cigar Company is proud to present a legendary marque’s first new release in years: the Punch Signature, a cigar that pays homage to the brand’s famous 175-year history while presenting a bold new look and feel especially created for the modern smoker.

Let me tell ya, this cigar is simply stunning to look at. A band that features retro turn-of-the-century artwork sits on top of a chocolate-brown Ecuadorian Corojo wrapper that is just shimmering with oil. Grown between two volcanic mountains in the fertile Los Rios Provence of Ecuador, these tobaccos deliver a slow burn, unique taste profile, and wonderful aroma. For those looking for a smoke that is truly one of a kind, this cigar’s exclusive leaf is a first in the industry, and has never appeared on any other!

Under the hood, specially aged Nicaraguan and Dominican long fillers complete the blend and stay true to the medium-to-full-bodied Punch experience.

Beyond the aesthetics and amazing build quality, this puppy is jam-packed with flavor! In order to enjoy all of its Honduran goodness for this review, I smoked the 6 x 60 Punch Signature Gigante.

Upon lighting this beast, my palate was served a blast of spice, which soon gave way to an unparalleled complexity highlighted by leather, cedar, cinnamon, and spice notes, plus the added bonus of a lingering butterscotch taste on the tongue that was lip-smackin’ good. Much to my delight, these flavors stayed true right down to my final puff.

So, where can you buy the fabulous Punch Signature? Duh, JR Cigar, of course! Do you really think I would to send you to the competition? If I did, I would lose this job and at 60 years old, the best I could hope for would be a thankless position greeting odd-looking people at the local Wally Mart (or maybe a male stripper at my Aunt Sadie’s nursing home, but I’d probably hurt my back sliding down the pole. However, as usual I digress).

Order yourself a box of the new full-bodied Punch Signature Honduran cigars today—you can thank us later! In fact, they are so darn tasty that I’m going to smoke another one just as soon as the cramps from my breakfast burrito wear off.

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